Assassins Never Cry
by SamK117
Summary: After two years apart, 16 year-old Killua and Gon find themselves reunited with their friends in Yorknew City, about to embark on a cruise to the island of Zeramor, a tropical paradise. Now fully in the throws of teenage angst, Killua feels pangs of attraction for Gon. Will he tell Gon how he really feels? Meanwhile, dark forces conspire against our heroes, just waiting to strike.
1. Reunion

**Author's Notes:**

**DISCLAIMER:** The later chapters in this story will feature sexual content and themes intended for mature audiences. Only read this story if you are legally permitted to do so by local law.

**Continuity with Hunter x Hunter Canon and Spoiler Alert:**

This story begins two years after the end of the Chimera Ant arc, which is currently where the 2011 anime is at. I had to extrapolate a lot from the available manga chapters covering what happens after this point to come up with what I think is a canonically plausible glimpse two years into the future, my goal being to try to avoid breaking from canon. It is of course impossible to do this without a number of key spoilers, especially if you have only been following the 2011 anime. You have been warned.

In terms of following canon, the priority list I use is as follows: 1) 2011 anime series, 2) manga, 3) 1999 anime series. The only exception I make to this rule is when the 2011 series omits something important or cute etc., or if the 1999 anime series has something to offer that that is canonically plausible, and enhances either the Gon x Killua pairing, or the Leorio x Kurapika pairing (e.g. the scene from the 1999 anime where Killua tries to get Gon to watch porn with him on the TV in their hotel room during the Yorknew auction arc). I haven't read through the manga nearly as closely as I've watched the 2011 or 1999 anime series, so please let me know if there are any inconsistencies or plot mistakes resulting from this.

You will also notice that I borrow elements from the opening scene(s) of the 2013 Hunter x Hunter: Phantom Rouge movie. My reasoning behind this is I felt it was a fantastic opening to an otherwise terrible movie, so I have salvaged it for this story. In fact, all my ideas for this story started when I found myself repeatedly watching that opening scene.

Unless otherwise stated, I try to stay as consistent as possible with canonical place-names, people-names, geographical locations, character abilities, and the like. Unfortunately there is very little information available on the geo-political situation in the Hunter x Hunter universe, and of all the different cities and countries, so I have done the best I can with what information is available on the various Hunter x Hunter wikis and online databases.

Though I have stated that I wish to stick with canon wherever possible, this does not mean I will shy away from killing off minor or even major characters if it serves the larger purpose of advancing this story. You have been warned.

* * *

**Chapter 1: Reunion**

High above the clouds, the airship's engines hummed busily as steel rotors sliced through the cold morning air. Inside, sunlight filtered through the cabin windows, giving the normally pale-faced boy an unusually rosy complexion as he stared warmly at his sleeping friend.

"Gon." the boy murmured to himself almost inaudibly, lost in thought.

They had been through so much together since that first chance meeting at the 287th Hunter Exam. In fact, it was somewhat of a miracle they had even met in the first place. Armed with only his skateboard and the vague notion that making a friend would be an excellent way to rebel even further against his parents, Killua had introduced himself to Gon on an absolute whim. Were it not for this simple, spontaneous act, the ex-assassin may never have met his first and fiercest friend, but more than that, the person whom he cared about more than anyone else in this world.

_There's no way I'll ever betray Gon, no matter what Illumi and dad say,_ he thought to himself, eyeing his friend protectively.

Killua let his gaze wander over Gon's sleeping body – black, raven-like hair, smooth tan-colored skin, and a contentedly sleepy smile. Though Gon's eyes were closed, the ex-assassin couldn't help but remember their deep honey-brown hue, and that unnaturally bright, wide-eyed look his friend wore almost all the time – unblinking, unyielding, naïve, but at the same time inexplicably wise, burning with the secret intensity of untold power.

Killua's gaze drifted downward, lingering on his friend's partially exposed chest. He found himself remembering how strong Gon looked without his shirt on. They had bathed countless times together during their travels, so nudity was typically no big deal for the two of them. However, now that they had been apart for so long, the ex-assassin couldn't help but wonder how much his friend had changed. In fact, he found this thought almost arousing…

And there it was again. That once merely fleeting, intrusive feeling that now dominated the ex-assassin's thoughts, especially when Gon was around. Attraction. There was simply no other way to describe it. Killua had a crush on Gon, his best friend in the whole wide world, and there was nothing at all he could do about it. Worse still, now that he was 16, these feelings were beginning to manifest themselves in new, awkward ways. As if on cue, dirty thoughts involving himself and the dark-haired boy started playing out in his head.

"Baka!" Killua cursed himself quietly, realizing that his wandering mind had begun to cause a physical reaction _down there_.

"Killua, is something wrong?" yawned an apparently awakened Gon.

"What?" the white-haired boy asked, quickly pulling his shirt down over his waist to make sure his friend couldn't see the latest in embarrassing underground developments.

"You were probably looking at my face!" the dark-haired boy accused.

"I wasn't." Killua stated flatly, almost convincingly.

"Lies!" Gon exclaimed gleefully.

"I'm not lying." the ex-assassin insisted, his cheeks turning bright red.

"That seems veerrry suspicious…" the dark-haired boy teased suggestively.

"Whatever," Killua shrugged, trying to ignore the cutely mischievous expression on his friend's face. It was still very disorienting being around Gon after they had been apart for so long. Not sure what to do now, he turned to face the window and soon found himself watching a passing flock of birds. Even with this distraction, he still couldn't get Gon out of his head.

_A gay Zoldyck… Mother would probably have a cow._ He chuckled to himself at the thought. _When was it that all of this first started anyway?_ he wondered.

Killua started to trace back through his entire history with Gon, trying to remember when he had first started feeling this way. He remembered their first meeting at the Hunter Exam; their training at Heaven's Arena where they learned about Nen; that night under the stars on Whale Island; their capture and escape from the Phantom Troupe in Yorknew City; Gon's boundless exuberance upon clearing Greed Island; and finally, the terrible atrocities committed by the Chimera Ants in the NGL, Gon's frightening victory over Pitou, and the terrible cost of that victory. Killua shuddered remembering his friend's mangled, practically lifeless body; how this sight had almost brought tears to his eyes, even though assassins never cry.

_I can never let anything like that happen to him again. Not to Gon._ He thought to himself.

Killua's thoughts were abruptly interrupted by an annoying female voice echoing over the loudspeaker.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to arrive in Yorknew City. Please fasten your seatbelts as we prepare to dock." The voice turned off with a click as Gon looked up at Killua excitedly.

"We're finally in Yorknew again! It'll be just like old times!" He exclaimed.

"Old times? You mean like getting chased and almost killed by the Phantom Troupe?" the ex-assassin remarked incredulously. "Or maybe…" he continued, an evil cat-like grin forming on his face, "maybe you were referring to that time you were too much of a baby to watch porn with me that night in the hotel…"

Truthfully, it had seemed like a good plan at the time, but this plan, like many of Killua's other plans to get some sort of sexual read off of Gon, had ultimately failed. Though he had tried to get Gon to watch the video with him, he had ended up watching the whole thing alone in the dark while Gon faced the wall in protest of this new violation of their shared sleeping space.

_God girls are so gross,_ Killua thought, remembering that horrendous woman from the video. The guys weren't so bad though – at least the one was pretty attractive. Smiling, Killua remembered how he had risked switching to some more… stimulating programming once Gon finally fell asleep.

"I WAS NOT A BABY!" Gon shouted, catching the attention of nearly everyone on the airship. "Just because I wasn't totally perverted like you back then doesn't mean I was being a baby." the dark haired boy added sheepishly, lowering his voice.

"All right fair enough," the ex-assassin said, shaking his head.

As far as Killua could tell, Gon Freecss had absolutely zero sex drive, though maybe even that had changed while he had been busy tending to Alluka and Gon had been off training with Ging. Admittedly, the way Gon went out of his way to say "back then" was rather suspicious. _Does that mean he wasn't perverted then, but is now?_ Killua mused. Either way though, right now he was mostly just grateful that he would finally get to spend some quality time with Gon.

Killua had Mito-san to thank for that. She had become very lonely ever since Gon had left Whale Island to become a Hunter like his father, and when her grandmother died, she basically had no one left to keep her company. When Alluka and Killua came to visit Mito-san, Alluka immediately took a tremendous liking to her, to the point where they ended up staying on Whale Island months longer than they had originally planned.

While Killua loved his younger sister very deeply, he was no baby-sitter, so it was a great relief when Mito-san offered to look after her permanently. Alluka was quite pleased with this arrangement, and Killua agreed immediately once it became clear that Nanika wasn't going to pop out at the wrong moment and wipe out half the population of the island while he was gone. It worked out for everyone – Mito-san finally had a kid to take care of again, and Alluka finally had a real parent who loved her, so Killua felt he had no business sticking around any longer. Besides, after almost two years without seeing Gon, he was really starting to miss his friend terribly, even though they talked together on the phone on an almost daily basis.

"Killua..." Gon nudged.

"What's up?" the ex-assassin inquired.

"I umm… I really missed you" he said, smiling sheepishly. "Things just weren't the same without you around, and I guess I'm just really glad you're back!" the dark haired boy added, smiling brightly.

Normally Killua would have slapped him for saying something so embarrassing, but he was really glad to hear that Gon felt similarly, though he doubted that his friend felt exactly the same way he did.

"Yeah, well ummm…. I really missed you too," the white-haired boy murmured, cheeks turning bright red. At that moment, the cabin doors swung open.

"Whoops, looks like it's time to go!" Killua added quickly, relieved that they had finished docking and could finally leave their seats. The two boys collected their things, walked across the tarmac, and entered the vast, bustling terminal. When they reached the customs desk, they skipped the line, casually flashing their Hunter's Licenses as they passed through the security checkpoint.

"It was really nice of Leorio to pay for all of us to go on a cruise" Gon commented.

"Well it's about time we celebrate him becoming the new chairman of the Hunter Association. It's taken him what like two years to find time to do this?" Killua added.

"I'm sure he's been very busy with official duties and stuff like that," Gon mused, wondering what it was exactly that the chairman of the Hunter Association did on a regular basis.

"Yeah if by official duties you mean secretly making out with Kurapika, then I'm sure he's been veeerry busy," Killua said suggestively. Both boys chuckled, recalling how several days after Gon had returned from his training with Ging, Gon had gone to visit Leorio at his apartment only to find him with Kurapika backed up against the wall in a rather compromising position. Leorio had always presented himself to the boys as a real ladies' man, so Killua personally couldn't wait to torment him with offhanded comments about his secret Kurta lover.

"Anyway, I can't wait to see our boat," said Gon. "Sometimes big cruise ships visit Whale Island, but I've never actually been on one before!" he added excitedly.

"Mmm the cruise will be fun, but just wait until we get to our destination," Killua replied. "Zeramor Island is supposed to be a tropical paradise, and I hear they even have those 'clothing optional' beaches there," he said, grinning like a cat. "Aren't you curious to see what those island girls think of your body after all that training? We'll probably have to use Nen just to keep them away from us," he added, making a mental note to electrocute the first girl who gets anywhere near Gon.

"Why would I care what they think though? Don't you remember what Bisky taught us? How appearance has nothing to do with power?" Gon asked, slightly confused by what Killua was getting at. "The way my body looks shouldn't really matter…" he added shyly.

"Haha true," Killua replied, quietly face-palming. _Well that went right over his head._

"KURAPIKA!" Gon exclaimed, running over to greet the blond-haired Kurta, who had just emerged from around a corner. Kurapika was flanked closely by Leorio, dressed in his usual blue business suit and teashades. The pair looked up and smiled when they saw Gon rapidly approaching.

"Gon! How's it going buddy?" Leorio said, ruffling Gon's already unruly, raven-like hair with his hand.

"Hello Gon," Kurapika said warmly, offering an outstretched hand to the dark-haired boy, who quickly took it and shook with the Kurta, beaming.

Killua watched these proceedings cautiously from a distance, not one for big friendly greetings.

"Killua, get over here!" Leorio insisted. "You're missing all the fun!"

"OK," the ex-assassin shrugged, approaching the trio. "How's it going guys?"

"Come here you…!" Leorio said, pulling Killua in and ruffling his hair. Annoyed, Killua frowned and quickly brushed it back to its original state.

"Killua, you look taller, and so does Gon," the Kurta observed.

"Heh, well at least some things never change… Leorio still looks like he's 37," said Killua. Everyone laughed at this remark except Leorio, who just scowled.

"I'll have you know I'm just barely over 23!" Leorio yelled in response, but this just made everyone laugh even harder.

The four friends exited the terminal and headed towards the street. A white limousine pulled up bearing the Hunter Association emblem.

"Perks of being the chairman," Leorio chuckled. "Come on everybody get in!" Before they could comply with his request, however, a small green man exited the limo.

"Oh fuck me." Leorio swore quietly to himself.

"Beans!" Gon shouted.

"Why hello there Master Gon," Beans responded politely. "Good to see you all again," he added, before turning to face Leorio. "Now, chairman, before you go there is still that small contingency of your opening remarks for the one-star hunter award ceremony, not to mention you still haven't signed the updated international border defense treaty, and let's not forget the…"

"Beans," Leorio interrupted. "I trust you can handle all of this without me. Now if you please, I'd like to get going on my vacation. If you really need help with something just have the vice chairman take care of it or better yet go find Ging and ask him." Gon smirked at this last remark, knowing all too well how difficult of a man his father was to track down.

"Yes sir of course. I'll attend to all of that right away." Beans said, raising his hand to summon a cab.

"OK sorry about that guys," said Leorio. "Anyway, we have until tomorrow morning before our cruise departs, so where to?"

"I'm starving!" both Gon and Killua said in unison.

"All right then food it is!" Leorio exclaimed.

They had lunch at a fancy restaurant Kurapika had heard about when he was working undercover for the Nostrade family during the Yorknew auction. For the rest of the day they toured around the city to see some of the sights they had missed during their last visit.

"Something is different about them," Kurapika said, watching Gon and Killua use their Nen to skip stones across the Yorknew harbor as the brilliant orange sun melted into the sea.

"What do you mean?" Leorio asked. "Of course they're different – they're much more powerful than they were last time we saw them," he added.

"No. I don't mean that," the Kurta replied. "Something has changed between them."

"How so?" Leorio asked curiously.

"I just feel that there's something different about the way Killua looks at Gon, or rather…" Kurapika paused and thought for a moment. "It's not that Killua looks at him differently; he just looks at him..."

"More." Leorio finished his friend's sentence, realizing what the Kurta was getting at. He had noticed it too. As usual, Killua had remained glued to Gon's side for most of the day, but Leorio couldn't help but notice that every time Gon was looking the other way, the ex-assassin could be seen gazing in his friend's general direction, a subtle, far-away smile on his face. "Granted, they haven't seen each other at all for what? Like two years? It doesn't seem so odd when you think about it that way," Leorio mused.

"Perhaps." Kurapika replied, not fully convinced that Killua's blatant, longing stares were as innocuous as his friend was suggesting. "I guess we'll have to wait and see," the Kurta added, a twinkle of mischief flickering in his normally vacant brown eyes.


	2. One Night in Yorknew

**Author's Notes:**

Thanks guys for your support and thoughtful comments on Chapter 1. I am going to try to continue uploading a new chapter every week and a half or so for the foreseeable future. So far, I have at least 14 chapters planned, so stay tuned.

**DISCLAIMER:**

This story features sexual content and themes intended for mature audiences. Only read this story if you are legally permitted to do so by local law.

* * *

**Chapter 2: One Night in Yorknew**

After a large, extravagant dinner the four friends entered the exclusive Hotel Beitacle hoping to find a place to crash for the night.

"Well, this brings back some splendid memories," Kurapika commented dryly.

Leorio leaned in to the two younger boys so that the Kurta was out of earshot. "Don't mind him... this is where Kurapika stayed when he had to take care of Neon during that whole incident with the Phantom Troupe," he whispered. "Can't be helped, though, seeing how all the other hotels we tried were already full."

"Hmm that's too bad I guess you'll have your hands full tonight with grouchy Kurapika," Killua grinned, an evil glint in his eyes.

"I'll admit, he sure can be a pain in the ass sometimes," Leorio sighed.

"Yeah, you'll never get to make out with him at this rate," Gon added, catching on.

Leorio did a silent double take. "YOU SAW THAT?" he whispered incredulously.

Killua smirked. He had been about to make a joke about Leorio probably being a pain in _Kurapika's_ ass, but having Gon in the conversation made things much funnier, so he let his friend continue.

"Well a few weeks ago I came to visit, but you were busy with Kurapika, so I decided to come back later," the dark-haired boy stated innocently.

"WHAT DID YOU SEE?" demanded Leorio, glancing over his shoulder to make sure Kurapika couldn't hear what was being said, only to find that the Kurta had gone ahead and was already talking to the receptionist.

"At first Kurapika was against the wall, and you were kissing him... I was using Zetsu so you couldn't sense me," Gon began.

"At first? You mean you saw more? What exactly did you see?" Leorio asked, almost not wanting to hear the boy's answer.

Gon scratched the back of his head searching for the right words to describe what he had seen. "During mating season, the foxbears on Whale Island do this thing where one sort of pushes against the other one over and over again. Usually it's a male and a female, but sometimes it's two males," he continued. "They look really happy when they do it, especially at the end..." the boy mused. "Kurapika was making all sorts of noises so I almost came in to save him because I thought you were hurting him, but when I saw the look on his face I realized you guys were just having fun like the foxbears," Gon added, his honeyed eyes welling with innocence. Unable to control himself any longer, Killua fell on the floor in a fit of laughter.

_Please someone kill me,_ Leorio thought, looking like he was going to melt away with embarrassment. He also felt a strong urge to find Ging and throttle him for being such an awful parent. _Does this kid really not know about sex?_ Before Leorio could say anything to the now confused looking Gon, Kurapika gestured for the three of them to come over.

"Is there a problem?" Leorio asked, approaching the desk. "I'm the chairman of the Hunter Association, and I need a place where my guests and I can stay for the night," he continued, flashing his special-issue Hunter's License at the receptionist impatiently.

"I'm sorry sir, we usually try to keep the presidential suite available for important visitors such as yourself, but tonight we're almost completely booked. I can spare one regular room with a single queen-sized bed, and one with two twin-sized beds." The receptionist added, obviously dismayed that he couldn't offer better accommodations to the chairman of the Hunter Association and his guests.

"Well, I imagine you two won't have any complaints there, what with recent developments and all..." Killua chuckled, nudging Leorio. Kurapika frowned distastefully at the ex-assassin.

"Actually, I think I'll take one of the twin beds," the Kurta interjected. Leorio looked at his companion in surprise. "The chairman can do whatever he likes," he added curtly.

_I guess that means Gon and I get the queen-sized bed,_ Killua thought to himself. _I better not try anything, though. The last thing I want is to lose Gon as a friend._

"Very well sir, here are your room keys," the receptionist said, handing a pair of key-cards to Kurapika, and an additional pair to Gon. "Checkout is at 11:00 AM. Do enjoy your stay!"

"Cool, let's go see our room!" the dark-haired boy exclaimed.

"Yeah! I bet a nice hotel like this will have some pretty decent video games!" Killua said excitedly. The pair scurried up the main stairwell leaving Leorio and Kurapika standing in the lobby.

"So what's with you?" Leorio asked. "I thought you wanted to..." he started.

"Not tonight." the Kurta interrupted.

"May I ask why?"

"Three reasons: First, I have much better hearing than you people seem to think... I heard Gon describing what he saw, and I blame you entirely. You should have locked the door."

Leorio scratched the back of his head awkwardly, waiting for the Kurta to continue.

"Second, I haven't been feeling very well. I'm not sick or anything – being here again just brings back a lot of memories. It's as if there's a spider around every corner," he said, absentmindedly gripping the chains connected to his right fist so hard that his knuckles turned white. "Don't worry about me though. Really, I'm fine," he added, noticing the concerned look developing on his friend's face.

"Nothing a few drinks won't cure," Leorio winked.

"Oh, fine... I suppose it couldn't hurt," the Kurta relented, smiling meekly. The pair walked through a doorway leading to the hotel bar and sat down, eyeing the leather seats and elegant mahogany-paneled walls.

"So what was the third reason?" Leorio inquired, signaling to the bartender to bring a round of drinks.

"Well, my dear Leorio, it's something much more devious than my first two reasons," Kurapika intoned coyly. "You see, I had an idea."

"Oh? Do tell..." Leorio prodded.

Kurapika sighed. "You of course remember my theory about Killua and what seems to be his... fondness for Gon?"

Leorio nodded for him to continue.

"Well I thought our friend could use some help," the Kurta said, his lips beginning to curl into a smile.

"So you're just throwing them together in the same bed when they haven't even seen each other for two years?" Leorio asked incredulously.

"Precisely," said Kurapika.

"I'm not so sure that's the best idea though, and besides, aren't they awfully young to be..."

"What, fooling around?" the Kurta interrupted. "If I remember correctly you were quite a few years younger when you did most of your 'fooling around' with sweet little Pietro."

For a moment, Leorio turned bright red, but his embarrassment quickly subsided and was replaced with a gloomy, downward glance. "It's sort of cruel of you to bring him into this..." Leorio mumbled, a twinge of sadness in his voice.

"I'm sorry, Leorio, I suppose that was rather insensitive of me," the Kurta apologized.

"It bloody well was!" Leorio spat. "It's not like I go around referencing Pairo all the..."

Kurapika glared at his friend, daring him to finish the sentence. Instead, Leorio paused, twiddling his thumbs nervously for a moment before asking the bartender to bring another round of drinks. When their drinks arrived, the pair sat quietly enjoying the silence for a while before Leorio dared to speak again.

"I just highly doubt that Gon is into guys. I mean I can totally see him being a huge man-whore with the ladies, but either way it's probably a one-sided thing," he mused.

"Or he could just fancy every single thing that moves, like someone else I know..." Kurapika said, frowning at Leorio, who was presently eyeing an attractive young woman who was sitting across the bar.

"I guess that's also a possibility," Leorio admitted, quickly redirecting his gaze back in the direction of his Kurta lover.

"You're right to worry about Killua, though. In fact, it's rather decent of you, really," the Kurta added softly.

"Now hold on a minute I wouldn't go that far. I mean we both know that boy is a cold hard killer... but Gon is pretty much his only close friend. If that were to go away..." Leorio trailed off.

"But see? You do care about Killua. And here I thought you were just a heartless asshole," Kurapika said, grinning.

"Whatever," Leorio sighed. "You want some dessert?"

"Me? Sure, as long as there aren't any strings attached..." Kurapika said, faking a frown.

"You're impossible, you know that?" Leorio said. "Ok fine, if strings are too much how about something more familiar?" he asked, a sly expression forming on his face.

"What did you have in mind?" the Kurta asked innocently.

"Oh, I dunno, maybe... chains?" Leorio replied suggestively.

"Maybe if I feel like it..." the Kurta yawned with exaggerated nonchalance. Leorio shuddered quietly, surprised by the sudden sensation of cold metal links brushing lightly against his right leg...

* * *

After playing video games for several hours, Gon and Killua grew tired and decided to finally call it a night.

"Well I have to admit this sure beats sleeping in a tree with Ging," Gon sighed, flopping onto the bed and feeling the silk comforter rub softly against his chest.

Killua faced the wall and began shucking off his clothes until he was dressed only in his dark green colored briefs. In the dim light, the ex-assassin looked almost like a pale, white ghost. For a moment, he thought he could feel Gon's eyes tracing over his slender, shirtless body. _What the... did he just check me out?_ Killua wondered. _No, it was probably just my imagination._

Killua turned off the lights and approached the bed, tucking himself in and taking extra care to keep an appropriate distance between himself and his friend.

For a while both boys just lay there in the dark. Killua listened intently to the sound of Gon's breathing, thinking about how long it had been since they had been this physically close to each other. He was too nervous to say anything... too nervous even to move. The ex-assassin lay motionless for what seemed like an eternity until Gon finally broke the silence.

"Killua... you slept in my bed when you stayed on Whale Island, didn't you? I just realized!" Gon exclaimed.

Killua turned over to face his friend and nodded, wondering where this was going.

"Well? Did you enjoy it?" the dark-haired boy inquired sweetly.

Fuck yes, Killua thought to himself. Heck, that bed even smelled like Gon, so it was almost like he was there. "Well..." the ex-assassin stammered. "I guess it was fine. Pretty average as far as beds go, you know? I did like it though..." he admitted.

"Yeah, I love it there too. What I miss the most is Mito-san tucking me in every night..." the dark-haired boy trailed off, recalling old memories of his home on Whale Island, his warm bed, and Mito-san.

"She misses you a lot you know," Killua said quietly.

"Of course... I miss her too," Gon sighed. For a while both boys remained silent, enveloped in darkness, slowly drifting in and out of consciousness.

"I missed you more though..." Gon added cautiously, moving closer so that his face was inches away. Killua froze. The dark haired-boy paused for what seemed like an eternity. He was so close that the ex-assassin could feel Gon's warm breath on his face. "Why did you stop answering my calls?" Gon whispered softly, a hint of pain in his voice.

"I... I lost my phone when Alluka and I were ambushed, remember?" Killua replied.

"You could have got a new one... you didn't call me for a whole year! I didn't even know if you were alive until Mito-san told me you and Alluka were staying with her," Gon added, his eyes shining, wide as saucers.

"I'm sorry!" Killua squeaked, his voice cracking. There really was no excuse. Leaving Gon had been one of the hardest things he had ever done in his life, but at the time he thought it was absolutely necessary, even if all he wanted to do was to remain at his friend's side. Gon had finally accomplished his goal of finding Ging, and Killua had Alluka to protect, so there wasn't any excuse for him to stay with Gon any longer.

"It was very selfish of me, and I'm sorry," the ex-assassin continued. "I was just afraid..." he added.

"Afraid of what?" Gon asked sweetly.

"I was afraid that if I kept hearing your voice every day... I... I wouldn't be able to stay away, and I'd just end up coming back," Killua said, his deep blue eyes welling, shimmering like sapphires in the dark. "By the time Alluka and I were with Mito-san, I realized how selfish it was, so when you started calling the house, I started answering again. I'm really sorry I put you through all of that... I didn't know you were so worried!" he added.

"Baka..." Gon said. "That sounds like the sort of dumb thing I would do. You know I'm supposed to be the stupid one, not you," he added, shaking his head.

"Can you forgive me, then?" Killua asked, avoiding his friend's gaze.

"Come here..." Gon replied.

Killua moved closer and froze, not sure what he was supposed to do. The dark-haired boy closed his eyes, reached out, and embraced the ex-assassin in a warm hug. Killua gasped at the feeling of Gon pressed against his bare chest, instantly melting in his friend's strong arms.

"I forgive you," Gon murmured, tickling Killua with the vibrations from his voice. "Just promise me you'll never do that again."

"I promise," Killua whispered, meaning it.

For a while neither boy moved. Deep down, the ex-assassin wished he could remain like this forever, wrapped safely in his friend's arms, but he knew better. _Gon doesn't like me like that..._ he thought to himself. After a minute or so Killua broke away from his friend's embrace.

Feeling Killua pull away, Gon sighed, rolling over so that he was lying on his back. "Goodnight, Killua," he whispered.

"Goodnight," the ex-assassin replied.

Within minutes, Gon's breathing changed and he began to snore softly. Killua found himself frozen, listening to the sound of his friend sleeping. _He hugged me,_ he thought, feeling as if his whole world was glowing. _This is Gon we're talking about, though, so it probably doesn't mean anything, but it sure was nice..._

Suddenly the white-haired boy found himself possessed with an idea. _God I'm going to regret this,_ he thought.

Cautiously, Killua leaned over until he was inches away from his friend's face. Making sure Gon was still asleep, he leaned in even closer until their lips were lightly brushing against each other. Even though Gon was asleep, kissing him like this felt electric, indescribable.

Suddenly, the ex-assassin felt his friend stir slightly and mumble something in his sleep. Killua quickly pulled away and flipped over onto his stomach, pretending to be asleep. _Shit, that was close,_ he thought.

The ex-assassin listened closely for several minutes to see if Gon's breathing would change. Satisfied that he hadn't been caught, he settled down and finally drifted off to sleep.


	3. Departure

**Author's Notes:**

As promised, here is Chapter 3. I will be uploading a chapter every sunday night hopefully until this story is complete. Feedback would be greatly appreciated!

**DISCLAIMER:**

This story features sexual content and themes intended for mature audiences. Only read this story if you are legally permitted to do so by local law.

* * *

**Chapter 3: Departure**

Sun filtered through the curtains, shining on the faces of the two sleeping boys. Gon stirred, squinting as his eyes adjusted to the bright morning light. He sat up and found himself staring at Killua. The white-haired boy looked so peaceful while he slept that he almost didn't want to wake him, but he was too excited to contain himself.

"Killua! Wake up!" Gon said, shaking his friend.

Killua woke with a start, still on edge after his daring actions the night before. Seeing Gon, he searched his friend's eyes for any sign of something out of the ordinary. Satisfied that nothing was amiss, the ex-assassin stretched lazily and pretended to yawn, trying his best to seem as casual as possible. "Morning Gon," he mumbled.

"KILLUA aren't you excited?" Gon gasped. "We go on our cruise today!"

"Yup, I can't wait!" Killua replied brightly. "So, did you sleep well?" he asked.

"Yeah actually I slept really well... like one of my best nights ever in fact," Gon said in a brighter-than-usual tone.

Killua blushed, hoping his friend didn't remember anything too specific, although a small part of him secretly hoped that he did. _It's almost definitely a coincidence, though... there's no way he was awake for that. I would have sensed it._

"Anyway we should get going... I call first shower!" Gon exclaimed. Before Killua could say anything, the dark-haired boy began ripping off his clothes until he was standing there completely naked. The ex-assassin turned bright red and looked away, but not before sneaking a quick peak at his friend's lean teenage frame. Not only was Gon much bigger down there than Killua remembered, but now he had pubes, which was certainly a new development.

Sensing that Killua was looking in his direction, Gon yawned loudly, making a big show of stretching, apparently trying to show off.

"Damnit Gon! You realize we're not little kids anymore. You... you can't just go around naked all the time like we used to..." Killua complained, his face now practically the color of a ripe beet.

"Why not? It's just you... you've seen me naked probably hundreds of times," Gon replied.

Killua glared, still partially red in the face. Gon merely shrugged and entered the bathroom to begin his shower.

Watching his friend go, the ex-assassin sighed and flopped back onto the bed. As he lay there, he found himself thinking about Gon, which was understandable considering the fact that he could now picture his friend completely naked without leaving anything up to his imagination. In his mind's eye, he envisioned Gon's chiseled abs, his strong arms, and his black raven-like hair. Moving his hand over his own shirtless body, Killua focused his attention lower, trying to recall every detail he had seen just moments before. Soon his fingers were sliding across his lower abdomen. Moving lower still, he found himself tracing lightly over the outline of something hard straining against the green fabric of his briefs.

"Killua, shower's ready!" Gon shouted, sticking his head out of the bathroom door.

Killua nearly jumped off the bed in surprise. "Oh, OK thanks," he said, grabbing his towel and walking towards the door, taking special care to cover his crotch.

Gon emerged from the steamy bathroom struggling to get his shirt over his head, the entire lower half of his body still uncovered. As Gon stumbled by, the ex-assassin took advantage of the situation, quickly glancing at his friend's lower body.

Once Killua was in the bathroom, he leaned his back against the door and sighed. He was hard as a rock. Ever since he had been reunited with Gon back at Whale Island, he had been by his friend's side practically 24/7, so he'd gone for almost a week now without any kind of sexual release. Slipping out of his clothes, Killua got into the shower and turned on the water. Against his better judgment, he immediately began stroking himself, trying his best not to moan as images of Gon's naked body flashed through his mind. _Fuckkk I needed this_, he thought, lying down on the bottom of the tub and closing his eyes out of sheer ecstasy.

Meanwhile, Gon had finally managed to get his shirt on and was absentmindedly flipping through TV stations while he lay on the bed, intently waiting for Killua to finish his shower. Bored with what the TV had to offer, he decided to practice his Zetsu, so he turned off the TV, sat in a meditative position, and released his Ten. Immediately all traces of Gon's aura disappeared and his senses became heightened. The room went completely silent save for the gentle sound of running water coming from the bathroom. Except... there were other sounds too. _Is that... Killua?_ the dark-haired boy thought to himself. Perplexed, Gon approached the bathroom door, reactivating his Ten just in case there were enemies.

"Oh fuck oh fuck OH FUUUUCK!" Killua whispered, arching his back and stifling a moan as string after string of white viscous fluid splattered onto his chest.

"Killua...? Are you OK?" Gon spoke cautiously through the door.

"Huh what yeah I'm OK!" the ex-assassin stammered, almost tripping over himself as he stood up a little too quickly. "Really, it's nothing... I just took a huge dump," he added, his composure returning as he reverted back to his usual lying self.

"Oh, okay then," Gon replied awkwardly, returning to the bed to resume his Zetsu training.

As soon as Killua finished his shower and dressed, both boys exited their room and headed downstairs to join up with Kurapika and Leorio. Once the four Hunters were reunited, they made for the lobby to grab some light breakfast.

"Hey Kurapika, did you sleep well? Hope last night wasn't too rough..." Killua teased through a mouthful of toast.

"Oh, I was fine... the whole night was rather uneventful really," the Kurta replied ignoring the ex-assassin's provocation. "What about you?" he added, the beginnings of a smirk forming on his face. "Did you enjoy sleeping with Gon?"

Killua glared murderously at Kurapika, summoning all of his willpower just to keep from blushing. Leorio snickered. _Just what I fucking need... now that damn Kurta is onto me, and this bumbling idiot as well? Fantastic_, the ex-assassin thought.

"We slept really well! It was just like when we used to go on adventures together..." Gon interjected, an enthusiastic expression on his face.

"Yeah, it was fine," Killua added, trying to seem unperturbed by the Kurta's line of questioning.

"I see..." Kurapika said, still grinning.

"Hey guys, our ride's here," Leorio remarked, noticing the long white limo parked near the entrance to the hotel. The four Hunters finished eating, packed their bags into the trunk, and set out for Yorknew Harbor.

"Even after all this time around cities I still can't get used to how big everything is," Gon said, pressing his face against the window as they drove by several blocks of skyscrapers. "I have no idea where anything is, and it's just so different from Whale Island... I'd probably be hopeless if I tried to live here, not that I don't enjoy being in the city once in a while," he added.

Killua looked at his friend fondly, shaking his head. Even though Gon was one of the most powerful Nen-users in the world, he somehow managed to feel intimidated by something as simple as a skyscraper. In truth, Killua actually _liked_ that Gon still had little areas like this where he wasn't exactly bolstering with confidence. Given the dark-haired boy's profound innocence, there was never really any shortage of situations where Gon could use some help navigating this complex and confusing world. Filling in and compensating for these little shortcomings not only enhanced Killua's friendship with Gon, but more importantly made him feel like he was needed, like he actually belonged somewhere other than brooding atop Kukuroo Mountain or jetting around the world covertly killing people for money.

"I guess I'd be lying if I said I'm uncomfortable around cities," Killua admitted. "Most of my missions when I was younger were in cities like Yorknew... I know this place like the back of my hand. In fact I had to, really, or I would have been a bad assassin," he said. "In a way, this was sort of like my childhood stomping ground," Killua added, smiling grimly as he remembered all the blood he had spilled in the shadows of these very skyscrapers.

Gon eyed his friend with concern, hoping he wasn't reminiscing about some gruesome bloodbath from his assassin days.

"Not that I miss it or anything!" Killua added, seeing the look on Gon's face.

"Boys, looks like we're here!" Leorio announced. The limo turned onto a long wharf that extended directly into the center of Yorknew Harbor. A colossal white ship towered a daunting twenty-two stories above the water, casting an enormous shadow over the entire harbor.

"Hey Killua look it's the ship! OH WOW it's soo big!" Gon gasped, his eyes glued to the window.

"I'll admit, it's fucking huge," Killua said, legitimately impressed that something so large could even stay afloat.

"The MS Armida is the biggest, most luxurious passenger ship ever built. She's one of modern man's greatest accomplishments," Leorio said, marveling at the magnificent feat of human engineering towering above him. "This is her maiden voyage, so you guys are extremely lucky I was able to get tickets, though I have to say being the chairman didn't hurt," he added with a wink.

"Well, I suppose man never was a particularly modest creature, but there you have it," Kurapika grumbled, rolling his eyes."

The four Hunters exited the limo and began collecting their things. Leorio once again abused his chairman privileges allowing them to skip the main line and walk right up the gangplank into the hull of the behemoth vessel.

After walking through what seemed like hundreds of hallways and corridors they managed to find their rooms. Leorio and Kurapika had an enormous suite all to themselves, complete with their very own hot tub, a gigantic flat-screen TV, a minibar, a king-sized bed, and a private balcony overlooking a small villa with palm trees, a swimming pool, and even a swim-up bar. Gon and Killua had identical accommodations, except their room had two twin sized beds.

"I have to say, this is rather impressive Leorio," Kurapika said, smiling at his friend.

"Yeah this is incredible!" Gon exclaimed.

"Thanks guys. Anyway, it's pretty early in the day, but this is a celebration after all, so if you two don't mind, I think Kurapika and I are going to go see about that bar downstairs..." Leorio said, eyeing the crystal-clear water and the rows-upon-rows of cold, hard liquor waiting for him at the swim-up bar.

"Oh, way ahead of you," Killua snickered, chugging directly from a bottle of vodka he had evidently removed from the minibar.

"Killua, since when do you drink!?" Leorio shouted in an almost parent-like tone, though he was admittedly a little bit impressed that the boy could chug directly from the bottle without gagging.

"Hmm I guess since I discovered mudslides? Or maybe it was chocolate martinis... You realize they're all totally filled with chocolate..." Killua said as if stating the obvious.

It was only a half lie. Killua's first alcoholic drink had indeed been a chocolate martini, but he hadn't started drinking just because he wanted some chocolate. Really, he had started drinking to deal with being away from Gon. In fact, if it weren't for his training he probably would have become a full-fledged alcoholic by now, especially since he had had to deal with hearing Gon's sweet voice on the phone every day without getting to be around him or even see him in person for months on end.

"So how did you go from the occasional mudslide to chugging bottles of Grey Goose?" Leorio asked incredulously. "Also, you're only 16! You're totally underage!"

"Oh? Are you going to go tell on me to the big bad security guards?" Killua teased, dodging the first question.

"Leave them be, Leorio. They're both Hunters now so technically speaking they're allowed to drink. Unless you change that rule of course," Kurapika said.

"Oh, I'll definitely allow it. I'm pretty curious to see what these two are like drunk. Never know what could happen..." Leorio added, winking at the Kurta.

"Good, then I won't have to kill you, because I now like alcohol way more than chocolate, and you know what happens to people who get between me and my chocolate..." Killua said, a murderous, cat-like grin spreading across his face.

"OH GOD! Now you like alcohol MORE THAN CHOCOLATE!?" Gon exclaimed, clearly horrified, knowing full well that this was the same boy who had spent over two hundred million jenny on chocolate robots for "snacks" when he was only eight years old. "You're going to be worse than those sailors who used to come to Mito-san's bar!"

"Don't worry about me. I can handle myself just fine. What about you Gon, you want to try a few drinks?" Killua asked, hoping his friend would say yes.

"Hmmm well I've never tried one before because Mito-san would never let me, but now that I'm a Hunter I might as well," Gon replied, grinning.

The four Hunters put away their things and changed into their bathing suits when suddenly a female voice came over the ship's intercom.

"Welcome to the MS Armida's maiden voyage. We are about to set sail for Zeramor island, and would encourage all passengers to join us on the upper deck as we depart from Yorknew Harbor," the voice said.

"Neh, Killua, want to go wave goodbye to everyone while we leave the harbor?" Gon asked, his eyes glowing with excitement.

"Sure, race you to the top!" Killua replied. In a flash, both boys sprinted out the door and shot up the stairwell to the upper deck.

"Those boys... I don't know where they get all that energy. It's rather intimidating, really," Kurapika chuckled.

"Shall we head downstairs then?" Leorio asked.

"Yes, let's. Might as well get a head-start while everyone else is upstairs waving like idiots," the Kurta replied.

"I couldn't agree more," Leorio said, smiling fondly at the Kurta.


	4. Aboard the MS Armida

**Author's Notes:**

Sorry for the cliffhanger ending. Expect a full juicy chapter late on Sunday 6/29/2014. For those who are curious about the Carson McCullers reference, I was referencing an excerpt from _The Ballad of the Sad Cafe_. A google search for "Carson McCullers lover beloved" should find it for you. Also for those of you who haven't noticed by this point, some minor elements of my story were inspired by _Pandora's Lair_ by Alex Donado. I also feel a bit indebted to _Heh Killua _by Dadou.

**DISCLAIMER:**

This story features sexual content and themes intended for mature audiences. Only read this story if you are legally permitted to do so by local law.

* * *

**Chapter 4: Aboard the M.S. Armida**

It was some time before Gon and Killua came down from the upper deck to join their friends. Leorio and Kurapika were reclining by the pool in lounge chairs, sipping tropical drinks and basking in the mid-morning sun.

"Hey boys! Nice of you two to finally join us," Leorio said, raising his glass to the two young Hunters.

"Neh, Killua, wanna go for a swim?" Gon asked.

"Way ahead of you!" Killua yelled, jumping headfirst into the sparkling blue water.

"No fair!" Gon exclaimed, leaping in after him.

Leorio smiled watching the two boys splashing around. "Those two... it's been weird with them gone so long" he said, a hint of melancholy in his voice. He turned to face Kurapika only to find his friend buried in a book, completely oblivious to the typhoon of activity coming from the pool. "Hey, Kurapika, what have you been reading this whole time anyway?" Leorio asked, taking a large swig of his drink.

"Oh, some old trash by this Carson McCullers person. You'd probably find it boring," the Kurta added, not bothering to look up from his book.

"If you're reading it then it can't be that bad, though, can it?" Leorio prodded, legitimately interested in whatever it was that had been occupying his friend's thoughts.

"Well, to be honest, it's about love, so it's already guaranteed to be mostly nonsense from the outset," Kurapika began, marking his page and turning to face Leorio. "If you insist on knowing, though, she seems to think she has love all figured out, and that in general it's a terribly broken, only intermittently successful sort of thing," he continued. "I actually tend to agree with most of what she has to say, though it's all rather depressing..."

"Of course you do," Leorio said, rolling his eyes. "So what fascinating insight does this Carson McCullers person have into the infinite complexity and subtle intricacies of love?" he asked in a mock sophisticated tone.

"She claims that in all loving relationships there is a lover, and a beloved," the Kurta began, clearing his throat. "No matter what faults the beloved has, the lover will ignore all of them, desiring his beloved no matter what and above all else. The beloved could be an exceptionally ordinary person, even someone ugly, evil, or grotesque, but to the lover, he is the most beautiful creature on this earth, to the point where all his faults become irrelevant," Kurapika continued, taking a moment to smile coyly at Leorio. "On the other hand, the beloved may legitimately appreciate the affections of the lover, or maybe he doesn't, in fact he may find the lover to be repulsive from the moment he first sets eyes on him, but even if they are together for many years, one thing is always certain: the beloved always comes to fear and despise the lover, for the lover wants nothing more than to strip the beloved of his humanity."

"That was a mouthful," Leorio said, seeming a little bit bewildered. "I think I saw something like that on TV once, though. I think it was 'everyone either settles for someone, or someone settles for them, but love can never be a truly equal exchange'... Something like that..." Leorio trailed off for a moment. "So I guess according to that logic I'd be the lover and you'd be the beloved," he continued. "But what of it? In a way you've always despised me, but it's not like you'd actually leave seeing how you despise everyone else so much more," he added, grinning.

"Not what I had in mind exactly, though you're certainly right that it's applicable to us," Kurapika replied. "I actually had our dear friends Gon and Killua in mind," he continued, smiling slightly. "When it comes to them, I think Carson McCullers somehow got it wrong. Whether it's merely friendship, or something more, their relationship... whatever it is they have... is fairly remarkable," he concluded. "As you put it, Leorio, neither Gon nor Killua really settles for the other, nor does one seem to be the lover while the other seems to be the beloved. Rather, they both just seem to care for each other equally. Do you understand what a rare thing that is? In that sense, they are perhaps the most fortunate individuals on this planet. My only hope is that they are able to find happiness with their first love where we could not," the Kurta added gravely.

"Jumping to conclusions again are we?" Leorio laughed. "You realize we still have no solid proof that either one of them is gay..."

"Oh please, have you seen Killua? The boy is practically flaming, and Gon, well... it's as if girls are invisible to him. He completely ignores them. I mean just look at those two!" Kurapika gestured to the two teenagers laughing and wrestling in the shallow end. "They look like they're ready to jump each other!" he exclaimed, laughing wholeheartedly.

After a rather violent game of Marco Polo in which a blinded Gon had grabbed Killua underwater around the waist, causing the ex-assassin to squirm around like a fish and blush profusely, the pair finally decided to calm down and resorted to sitting together by the side of the pool.

Gon sighed and lay down on his back, kicking his feet absentmindedly as they churned the clear blue water. Killua sat up and smiled fondly at his friend. He watched as drops of water slid down Gon's chest, meandering between row upon row of glistening wet muscle.

"Oi, Gon, wanna try a drink now?" the ex-assassin asked, grinning mischievously.

"Yeah why not?" the dark-haired boy replied, looking up to face his friend.

The two boys grabbed their wallets from the mess of green and white clothes strewn over one of the lounge chairs and hopped back into the pool. When they approached the bar, the bartender eyed the pair with suspicion.

"You two are aware it's against the law for us to serve alcohol to minors" he said curtly. Gon looked at Killua uneasily, unsure how to proceed.

"Is there a problem?" Killua asked, casually flashing his Hunter's License at the bartender, the slightest hint of murder gleaming in his steely blue eyes.

"Yeah, we're both Hunters," Gon said, pulling out his license and trying his best not to act like a little kid, though this was already proving to be an uphill battle.

For a moment the bartender just stared at the two licenses before him, absolutely dumbfounded. _Who the hell are these kids?!_ he thought to himself, half afraid that the white-haired boy was going to rip his arms off at any moment.

"Ye.. ye... yes, of course, what will it be young sirs?" the bartender stammered before quickly regaining his composure.

"A drink, please!" Gon exclaimed brightly, apparently unaware that there are in fact different types of drinks to choose from.

"He'll have a mudslide," Killua interjected. "And I'll get a chocolate martini, straight, and make it extra strong if you can..." he said grinning.

When their drinks arrived, Killua immediately downed his chocolate martini like it was water. At first Gon eyed his drink suspiciously, but once he took a taste he realized it was just like ice cream, so he gulped it down almost as fast as Killua.

"You like it?" the ex-assassin asked, pleased to see that Gon had got through his first drink so quickly.

The dark-haired boy nodded vigorously in response. "It's just like ice cream, but it's weird because it makes everything feel a tiny bit fuzzy," he said, beaming.

"That was just a baby drink, so it tastes really good because it doesn't have very much alcohol. If you're a real Pro Hunter, you'll do some shots with me," Killua said, a sly expression creeping onto his face. "I'm gonna warn you though, it'll taste bad and will probably burn your throat. The key is to pretend it doesn't hurt. Think of it like a challenge. You want to appear less affected than the other person. Do you think you can keep up with me?"

"OK I think I can do it!" Gon said, always ready for a challenge

Killua motioned for the bartender to come over. "Alright, can we get two shots of Belvedere?" he asked. "Oh, and also a water for him," he added, anticipating that Gon would need a chaser.

"No skip the water," Gon interjected with a grin, not wanting any special treatment.

"Yes sir of course right away," said the bartender, turning around to grab a clear frosted glass bottle from the top shelf. He placed two shot glasses in front of the boys and poured.

Killua clinked glasses with Gon and downed his shot all in one swift, fluid motion. Gon copied his friend, doing his best not to grimace when the vodka hit his throat.

"So how was that? You think you can do another?" the ex-assassin asked cautiously.

"Bleh it tastes gross, but it's manageable I think I can do some more," Gon said, an intense expression on his face.

Several shots later both boys were definitely feeling the effects of the alcohol.

"KIlllluaa we shouldd do one more so we can prove we're both Pro Hunters..." Gon stammered.

_Oh god, what have I created_, Killua thought, barely sober enough to keep from falling out of his stool.

"Gon we've had enough you don't want to throw up, do you? Here how about we just float for a while..." Killua said, sliding off his stool and dragging Gon into the pool with him.

"OK," Gon said. "Neh Killua why is everything spinning? I feel like I'm on a rollercoaster."

"That's the alcohol..." the ex-assassin said, slurring his words slightly.

By this point the four Hunters were not alone. Several girls who were just about Gon and Killua's age had congregated in the shallow end of the pool. They were eying the two young Hunters, whispering to each other and giggling.

"Hey what's your name?" one of the girls asked, cautiously approaching Gon.

"Ohhh, hi, my namee is Gon" Gon said, overtly slurring his words.

"I'm Liz," the girl said, smiling flirtatiously at the dark-haired boy. "Come over here let me introduce you to my friends!" she added playfully.

_Well, I'm going to kill this girl. That's all there is to it_, Killua thought to himself, sparks involuntarily forming at his fingertips.

* * *

**NOTE: **Sorry I haven't posted the new chapter yet. I have a boyfriend now and I'm finding I have a lot less time to write since I've been so busy. Been getting LOTS of inspiration for new material from

Will try to get this uploaded by the end of this weekend, and then after that point I'll try to do a new chapter every two weeks.


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